Once upon a time, there was a young high school student who was lost and aimless in his life. He was very creative and ambitious, but he was unsure how to collect his ideas and dreams and point them in a direction for him to follow. One day, he dreamt of being a writer, so that he could spread his new ideas to the world and inform the world the logical steps needed to fix society’s problems (this teenager thought he had it all figured out). However, the previous day, he had dreamt of being a creative director, as he wanted to express his emotions and ideals to captivate audiences and inspire others with his creation. The next day, he would dream about being an architect, so that he could devote his time and energy to using his hands and brain to build tall awe-inspiring structures. The week before, he dreamed about leading a tech start-up, to contribute to the technological progress of society. Clearly, this young student was unsure what path to take, and it made him anxious and worried about the trajectory of his life. He wanted to do it all, but by being aimless with his goals, he was about to do nothing.
More importantly, this young teenager was very introverted, and found very few people to discuss and share his passions and worries in life. Much like with his ambitions, this student felt lost in a sea of people. He was an introvert throughout his life, so the communities and groups a normal person would gravitate towards was foreign and alienating for this student. As his time in school was nearing to an end, this student was filled with many regrets and doubts. The student felt that the most important decision for him to take was one that would instill a sense of belonging, community, and purpose to his life. While he had no idea what he wanted to do in life, he wanted to fulfill the desire of being in a tight-knit community above all else. He felt that whatever difficult struggles or trials he was to endure would be worth it if it could bring him discipline, pride, and a focused direction in life. Besides, just the other day, he had dreamt of being a soldier.
And so, this young naive teenager dutifully enlisted in the US Marine Corps. After having just finished processing the insane decision he had just made, he said his farewells to his friends and family, and hopped on a plane headed towards San Diego, California. Within the first week there, this now young recruit had gone through training he had never thought he would do before. He had never been away from his parents. He had never been screamed at his face for hours on end. He had never been forced to run around in circles with a giant heavy log on his shoulder. He had never felt the tremble and recoil of a rifle’s powerful shot. He had never hiked so many menacingly tall and rocky hills. He had never done so much within the three months given to him. The recruit hated life every day, but he learned to appreciate the fact that every day came with new experiences for him to endure, no matter how awful or pointless they initially seemed.
The recruit had believed prior to this point in his life that he must choose a path that closely resembled the life he had lived and was most comfortable with. As he embraced the novelty of the many challenges and obstacles he faced while in recruit training, he slowly changed his perspective on life. Why live a life of conformity when new challenges and experiences can help learn more about oneself? The recruit learned how much he enjoyed the art of self-defense ground fighting. The recruit learned how much he enjoyed clearing his jumbled mind by running. The recruit learned how much he enjoyed working with others as a team to make a huge impact on a mission. So much of what this young recruit’s life would become was forged by these new experiences, and it’s a shame to think that had he not made that initial leap of faith into the unknown, he would have become a very different person.
After the longest twelve weeks of his life had passed, the young recruit became a person again, and was now a young Marine. He now had several months of further training to complete before he could be assigned his permanent duty station and role. While he had sighed in relief that the most difficult of challenges were over, he did not expect the new challenges that awaited him. Shortly after, the Marine felt lost again. The additional freedom that he was given, that he had so longed for, was now cursing him again. It was a difficult adjustment to become a person again, but he was no longer alone. He was surrounded by equally lost and young Marines who made the same mistake as he did. That common ground was enough to create a strong sense of camaraderie and community. The young Marine made friends with people of all different backgrounds and walks of life. The people around him looked and acted very differently from him, but they were united in their lost and wandering spirit. I have come to believe that commonalities such as looks, hobbies, and occupation are not nearly as strong as the struggles, ambitions, and worldviews shared among a community.
The young Marine’s training had finally ended, and he was off to perform his duties for his equally wild and tumultuous country. The shared community and worldview he had been made a part of with his friends gave the young Marine a sense of belonging. The connections he had made, and the accomplishments he had achieved also gave him a sense of pride. These were feelings that he had been sorely lacking in his youth, and he felt a peace of mind having finally achieved it. Nevertheless, he also made sure to moderate these feelings, as to not let it get to toxic levels. All too often he witnessed the untamed levels of confidence and pride rear its ugly head. The diversity of his connections, and his past experiences in life, made sure to balance these feelings and emotions. As he experienced new and exciting journeys, he still felt lost and aimless. This was of no concern for the young Marine just yet, as he was able to live vicariously through the equally erratic and lofty ambitions that his companions dreamt. So long as the world remained relatively stable, he would find his path eventually.
The world did not remain stable. In fact, everything became chaotic and unpredictable. The instability and turmoil came to define most of the young Marine’s time in service. At first, it was difficult to adjust to the new era for humanity. Luckily for him, he was privileged enough that it did not affect him negatively. As he had done so before, he learned to embrace the conditions, and make the most out of it. What these events finally did was to force discipline and focus into the young Marine’s life. His newly found pride, confidence and community helped establish a path for the young Marine to take. He had learned valuable lessons, and as the time unexpectedly came for him to move on to a new journey in life, for the first time ever, he finally felt confident in his abilities and ambitions.
The young Marine finished serving his self-imposed sentence, and he is now the person I am today. As part of the path that I have decided to begin taking, I have found myself sitting at a desk with a paper and pen in hand again. It often feels as if the past couple of years was a long detour in my life, but I have come to embrace that. I’m still not quite sure where life will take me, but the new unexpected challenges in life excite me more than they scare me. While I often think to myself if my contributions to the world did any good, I will be forever grateful for the strong community I have now found myself a part of for the rest of my life. It’s not so much the physical journeys that I look forward to, but rather the mental journey as I continue to refine myself and find new pieces of me still waiting to be found.